Feb.27 - Phnom Penh, Reuniting after 28 years

In Phnom Penh, we meet up with pa’s step brothers and their families. I stare at my step-uncles as they stare at me, and we all sit in bewilderment at our resemblances, (they take after their mom, my grandma). We are long lost family members. Tears well up in some of them; I bite my cheek. We are excited to be seeing each other for the first time in 28 years. They only remember me as a newborn. Now they are seeing me as a grown, married woman.

They asked their sister in Sisophon what fruits I seemed to enjoy while we stayed with her. She immediately responds “durian!” A soft, yellow, sweet, delicious fruit, and yes, yes with an incredibly strong odour, but like cheese the stronger the smell the more tantalizing the piece. The other favourite of mine here is translated as “sweet smelling coconut”. There are many varieties of coconuts here, and only this one I like. It’s the smallest of the varieties with a cream coloured shell and three darker circles atop of it. One of these dark circles is pierced to slide a straw in for the sweet juice. Mmm… mmm…mmm! On arriving to my step-uncles houses, we learn that their fridges are stocked with these fruits. My step-uncles and their families are intent on making this the best trip possible to entice us to come back.

In a desire to catch up, we attempt to speak to each other. I can understand about 80% of what they’re saying. They can understand about 10% of my Khmer. Clearly I can understand better than I can speak. My step-uncles kindly stare at me and giggle. When I’m done speaking, they turn to my mom and ask, “what did she say?” With few English speakers here, my Khmer has improved each day.

Feb.26 - Sisophon to Phnom Penh, To the big city!

With ma’s brother getting married in Phnom Penh two days from now and pre-wedding events starting tomorrow, we head to the big city today. The drive from Sisophon to Phnom Penh is a long one (5 hours). We depart at 6am, our driver stopping quickly for $1.25 bowl of ky-teow (like Vietnamese Pho or noodle soup) at an open front shack on the side of the road. (Ky-teow here is a popularly eaten dish in the morning). The place looks frequented by locals. It is also, however, littered with flies and ailing dogs. I have a couple noodles and leave the rest, itching to get back to the comfort of the car. Ma likely feels the same way, immediately calling for the bill. Catapulting into the car, we set off again.

En route to the city, we make a stop at Udong, the capital of Cambodia between 1618 and 1866—i.e. pretty much before the French colonization in 1863. Climbing onto a stilted wooden platform with picnic mats laid out, we rest for lunch, our food served by a cart vendor nearby. (Again, Maly worried about stomach; luckily stomach ok). Apparently, this place is packed with local picnickers during the weekend; this Tuesday, it is almost exclusively ours. After eating, we hike up the steps of the hillside to the ridges supporting several stupas (or at least their remains) and the Ta San Mosque. In one of the stupas with a face adorning the top rests the ashes of former royalty members. As we walk from stupa to stupa in the heat, our shirts become almost transparent with sweat. However, it is worth the view from the top. From the top, we get a sense of the vast rice fields, dotted palm trees, and sprawled Wat that comprise the town.

Ready for air-conditioning again, we trek back down to the car for our final destination. Alongside the road, we pass cars and vans spilling out people from within. I find this amusing; our driver finds it amusing that I do. He slows down for me to snap pictures. This spectacle is only a preview of what was to come in Phnom Penh.

Feb.25 - Sisophon, Where it all started

Ah the cold shower here…wakes you up immediately! Given how hot it is outside (min. 32 Celsius) you’d think I’d relish the cold water. However, going from an air conditioned room (which I’m not complaining about) into a cold shower is cc-cold. Like dipping into a pool for the first time, I have to ease myself into the sprinkling water. This means I first try splashing some water on me, then I step in for 5 seconds, step out, step in, step out, after a few rounds of this, I’m done. (Ma laughs).

More than any other day on this trip, however, I am ecstatic to feel alive. Today is the day I go back to my beginning.

We start off by visiting my late grandma’s grave on the hillside of a temple grounds outside of Sisophon. We find her tombstone, I fall to my knees. After leaving Cambodia at the age of one, I never met pa’s mom again. Out of her 17 grandchildren (all of which live in Cambodia, except my brother and me), I look most like her. In fact, pa’s step siblings (born from the same mom as pa) stare at me because of my indisputable resemblance to her. I learn from them that she had always hoped to see me again; it just never happened. By the time Cambodia had become safe and affordable to visit, she had since passed away. When pa came to see her just before she died, he had to fly from Phnom Penh into a town near Sisophon, because that route was unreachable reach by car. Reflecting on the arduous and curt life she lived, I vowed to live and have my family live the life she never had.

Next, I visit, for the first time, Bat Trung in the province of Battambang. It is here that my parent’s marriage was arranged and shortly thereafter solidified by their clasping hands in the air. It is here where my parent’s had to convene for orders by the murderous Khmer Rouge, where they were put to hard labour, where they starved (almost to death), where they started to eat cotton seeds to survive (even trying the plant myself), and where I was miraculously born alive. While I stood on the very grounds of these major events, I only got to see from a distance, however, where my family escaped. It is impossible to retrace their steps with land mines (and other death traps I just learned about) not completely cleared. Whenever I show my passport or I am introduced to a Cambodian, I am always referred to as (with wide open eyes) “oh a child born during the Khmer Rouge”, with people shocked that I am alive.

Twenty-eight years ago my mom carried me out of this country and specifically this village. Today, she brought me back.

Feb.24 - Damn it!

Convinced to take a mini-van from Bangkok to the Poipet border of Cambodia, ma and I got up at 5am to prepare, eat breakfast, and depart at 6am for our supposedly 4 hour, only one rest stop, “we promise no other stop” (said with a smile) trip. When our mini-van was an hour late, I got nervous. When it arrived, I was really happy to see there were 10 other tourists on board—strength in numbers! On making our “one and only rest stop” (which was at a gas station that also served as the meeting spot and starting line for a drag car race), I thought again, “What did we get ourselves into?” It was not until we were dropped off at a “Cambodia visa expediting” restaurant in the middle of no where that I realized we were living the story of travelers I’d read about cajoled into overpaying for their safety and proceeding with their trip. Damn it!

More on this story back home; let’s just say this wasn’t the most fun part of our trip. We were supposed to have arrived at Poipet at 10:30am. We finally arrived at 2:30pm. I was so ecstatic to see our Trails of Indochina driver on the other side of the border; he was on time and followed our planned itinerary. I’m all for adventures, but not the kind that unnecessarily puts life at risk. Thankfully, we were safe and ready again to have the time of our lives.

Once in Cambodia, we drove the dirt highway from the town of Poipet to Sisophon—literally and figuratively—looking forward to the road a head. Sisophon is the central location of parent’s upbringing and is still home to members of pa’s step family.

Here, we stayed at his step sister’s house. We were lucky to stay in a cement building with marble interior, electric lighting, semi-western style toilets, and air conditioning. We had no internet service, limited phone service, and only one knob on the shower (cold), but I was happy. Most other homes were shacks made of either aluminum or aged (this is a euphemism) wood. We visited the house of my late grandma, met my step grandpa, and a great aunt who lives with six dogs in a stilted wooden hut in the woods. It was at my great aunt’s house that I got five bites of Cambodia from their wicked mosquitoes. Somehow I was a mosquito buffet as everyone else was left untouched. Again, damn it!

Reflections on Bangkok

Reflections on Bangkok Four nights, 3 days in Bangkok: an easy place for a foreigner to navigate, pass time, and enjoy. The Thais are incredibly friendly (even when they are trying to overcharge you), deeply religious (with Wats every few blocks), and very loyal to the royal family (pictures of the King and Queen adorn the city). In SE Asia, where extreme poverty, a vibrant sex trade, corruption and a host of other differences from the West exist, it is actually comforting to see many other tourists. I would happily come back to Bangkok, except next time I will not be taking a bus from Thailand to Cambodia.

Feb.23 - Thailand, Bargains Day & Night

After going to bed at 8:30pm last night, getting up at 5am was a heck of a lot easier today. Starting with our usual breakfast, we then headed out to the infamous Chatuchak Weekend Market where over 8000 vendors tried to entice patrons to buy, buy, buy! Ma tried to buy, but was too big for most clothing. The vendors sold women’s clothing predominantly in one size only—my size. Ma was NOT as overjoyed by this. We still both had a blast though checking out the bazaar.

After all the walking up and down the aisles, checking out the stalls, we treated our feet to an unwinding Thai foot/leg massage. This “soothing” massage was quite the relaxing experience for ma. I, on the other hand, winced in pain and roared with laughter as the woman who did my massage had these unbelievably strong hands that jabbed my puny muscles and kneaded my ticklish spots. I squirmed in the faux leather recliner while my masseuse seemed completely oblivious to my reaction. My contorted face did little to transcend our language barrier, as she just stared at my feet. Gritting my teeth, I looked away from ma who was dying of laughter, but since I could still hear her I erupted in laughter and we both laughed until we cried. When it was over, I looked forward to walking again, because it wasn’t as painful.

With feet and legs ready to go again, we went back to MBK where ma had found things yesterday in her size. As you can see from the pic above, she really liked this mall. Funny that when we’re touring cultural sites ma can barely keep up with me, but when we’re in a shopping mall it’s the opposite: I can barely keep up with her! (Ma is laughing next to me).

At the end of the day, ma convinces me to have dinner at a dive (restaurant named Jok Phochana) in the alley behind our hotel. I’m all for dives, but not necessarily in foreign developing countries. Our travel guides do say though you haven’t experienced real Thai cuisine til you’ve sat along the side of a road on a plastic chair eating food from a stall. While I drew a line on eating anything from a stall, this dive had surprisingly savory food. Ma gave me the big “I told you so”, (in her Cambodian accent of course). After eating, we went home and packed for our long journey tomorrow from Bangkok to the Aranyaprathet / Poipet border of Thailand / Cambodia.

Feb.22 - Thailand, Palace & Mall

After waking up at 5am today, averaging the time when ma woke and I woke up yesterday, we set off for Vimanmek Palace, the largest teak wood mansion put up—or rather ordered by—King Rama V. No bags or cameras were allowed in the mansion. (Interestingly, however, film was sold inside. Needless to say, this shop looked immaculately untouched).

Following this palatial visit, we shopped at Bankgok’s most popular mall, MBK Center. Spread over eight floors, the mall kept us in like mice in a maze; we got lost several times trying to get out. While at the mall, we noticed that prices tended to end with 99, e.g. 199 or 299 baht. This mall-wide pricing strategy is effective when you have to pay 1 baht to use the rest room. The Thai charge for its use in exchange for keeping it kept clean—yeah I’ll pay for that!

With new shoes for ma and new business skirts for me (which I can only hope will also be as stylish in Toronto), we headed for the Mango Tree restaurant in the business district on EY’s recommendation. A reservation is highly recommended for this restaurant whose beautiful dark wood structure, terrace encircling the house, live Thai band and apparently one of the best Tom Yum soups are among its attractions. Arriving at 5pm, we were seated immediately. As the staff diligently set-up around us for the evening, we enjoyed the chef’s exclusive attention to our meal since it was the only one he had to prepare at the time. Not a bad strategy eh: show up early, no reservation necessary, enjoy all the attention, indulge in scrumptious food.

With more than satisfied bellies, we finally headed back to the hotel where, no joke, we fell a sleep at 8:30pm. The time difference still beat us, but the day, the fun, the experiences were our wins.

Feb.21 - Thailand, Royalty & Religion

Whew, what a day! Ma woke up at 3:30am, I slept in til 6:30am. After a free and filling breakfast at our hotel, we attempted to cross a major street, got scared and called for a tuk tuk - an open air cab for which you must negotiate the fare.

We took this tuk tuk across the street (embarrassingly not a lie) to the Grand Palace, where the royal family lives. Of course, we weren't invited into their living room, but we got to see the temple (Wat Phra Kaew) in which they pray and an Emerald Buddha resides.

We then walked to see another nearby temple (Wat Pho) housing the monolithic, gold reclining buddha with mother of pearl feet. This Wat is also home to the Thai Traditional Medicine and MASSAGE school. (Note: the school is actually across the street, down a couple blocks, and in an alley; took us a while to find it). Naturally, we allowed the massage students to practice on us. We highly recommend a Wat Pho Thai massage. Never has someone sitting on me felt so good!
Next, we boarded a boat to cross the Chao Praya River to see the temple of the dawn (Wat Arun). Ma was so scared to descend the Wat's steep steps she opted to go down slowly on her butt, (my two year old cousin Tyler uses this tactic).

Since the morning activities worked up our appetite, we took the boat back over and had one of the best pad thais for $2.50! Bellies full again, we went to the National Museum to take in more Thai culture. Who knew Thailand's current king, King Bhumibol Adulyadej (Rama IX), was born at Mount Auburn Hospital in Cambridge, Massachusetts! Having lived in MA, I felt connected…for a moment.

After all this we were pooped. Failing to bear the heat and time difference, we had a quick nap then headed to The China House restaurant at the Oriental hotel for dinner. Absolutely delicious with some of the best tea I’ve ever had – thanks DD for the recommendation! It was a great way to end a great day.

Feb.19/20 - HK International Airport

Me and ma after a 15-hour looong flight from Toronto to Hong Kong. Apparently we flew over the North Pole! No, we didn’t see Santa’s village. Waiting for our 2.5 hour flight from Hong Kong to Bangkok…